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I miss the old days of waking up in the morning just before I had to leave to school.  The familiar routine of brushing my teeth, getting dressed, and eating breakfast – I had it down to a science, doing it all in under 10 minutes.  Nowadays, leaving my house involves mentally preparing myself the night before, getting myself and my two children dressed and fed.  Provided that all of our schedules coincide smoothly we are out the door for 1-2 hours, only to head back home right after because someone is hungry or tired.

What really helped, back in the day, was that my school had very strict uniform policies.  As soon as I left school, getting dressed was a lengthy procedure, and not a pretty sight.  Sometimes I had to try on 3 outfits each morning, with half my wardrobe strewn over my bed.  (I’m almost too embarrassed to say, but still happens often )

So, I often wonder, how can schools NOT have a uniform?

The advantages:

• Time saver
• Cheaper
• Less pressure on children having to worry about how they look
• School able to ensure everyone is dressed appropriately and modestly
• Neat looking

While I strongly advocate that schools implement a uniform, children will bend the rules so they can stand out. Be it with their glasses, hair styles, or shoes. Here are some great “old school” styles that are actually weaving their way back into fashion:

Glasses, originally a source for mockery (four eyes), have become a telltale sign of a person’s fashion sense. To the extent that people include non-prescription eye-wear as part of their ensemble.

The original t-bar school shoes are always a classic, and go well with just about any outfit you can put together.

Remember to keep your hair in a tight ponytail, preferably a braid, to avoid catching lice.  A little trick: add a few drops of tea-tree oil to a water spritzer and spray your hair each morning to repel lice. It also helps with styling. Though time consuming, French braids are great for long hair. Here are step by step guidelines.

Good luck for the new school year!

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Most people link Tznius, modesty, with suppressing sexuality.

Overexposure and suggestive dress can make women vulnerable and subject to dangerous situations. Men, especially under the influence, are prone to elevated emotions and lower inhibitions. Matthew Poarch explains: A man who is impressed by the very thing that revealing clothes accentuate will most likely be shallow and disrespectful.

Of course, challenging any motivation to cover up is the current sweltering heat and skimpy styles. In the past century female fashion has deteriorated to bare essentials, and sometimes not even that. What message are these scantily clad women  trying to give? Unfortunately they are not even aware that their dress is negatively interpreted. Our generation has become immune to the beauty and meaning of modesty.

In truth, Tznius is more about maintaining your dignity.

Tznius appreciates the necessity for females to feel attractive. At the same time, Tznius promotes a modest dress code that can respect and honor women. Tznius not only alludes to dignity, but graciousness as well. It proves that the focus is not the exterior, but the interior beauty.

Rabbi Benjamin Hecht maintains that Jewish thought indicates that human dress is motivated by Kavod HaBriut, human dignity. We respect our bodies. It is the same reason we do not tattoo ourselves, or have multiple piercings.

As a young girl I was taught that every Jewish girl is a princess, a jewel. Just as we protect our jewels by wrapping them and keeping them safe in a jewelry box, we clothes ourselves in modest dress, albeit, beautiful clothing that can make us more attractive.

The quintessential summer top for the modestly conscious.

Made of light weight material, 95% cotton and 5% spandex, it is both breathable and maintains the perfect fit. The lifesaver promises an easy wash: machine washable,  no shrinking,  or fabric deterioration. It is available in both long and 3/4 length sleeves. The 3/4 sleeve top is currently available in four great colors: Black, White, Purple, and Heather Grey. For the full length sleeve we have Black, Ivory, Silver Grey, and Navy. A great range of sizes for everyone: XS-XXL.

The lifesaver is a basic wardrobe staple that can be worn plain or as a shell. For those that wish to avoid layering their clothing in the summer, but do not like the idea of wearing a plain top, can add a long necklace or summer kerchief. I personally love a plain white refreshing top in the summer, and buy them at every opportunity!

Take advantage of the current special! Lifesavers are only $20 each (in both long and 3/4 sleeves)!

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We’ve recently dug up an old article from the New York Times (note: PDF), published June 17, 1917, in which the author discusses some of his observations regarding the significance of woman’s clothing throughout history, and the changes that occurred after 1914.

Article from the New York Times on Women's Modest Clothing, 1917

Feminine apparel marked momentous occasions in history, as pointed out in many historical records and books; The French revolution is visualized through the liberty cap, the bodice, and the full skirt.  The author of the article says: no one brought back the picture of the day so vividly, as he who writes of the clothes worn by the people who took part in overturning or establishing governments.  Feminine trends literally color our history books.

However, the most significant change occurred after World War One, when the fashion world no longer conformed to one trend at a time.  There was a sudden explosion of style and color, incorporating costumes of various ethnic groups.  The skirt continued to shrink, which some linked to economic hardship.  And then, this overexposure of skin began to tug at many women’s intrinsic ethical standards.  The call for modest attire became the norm.  Now we observe an amalgamation of the past, the present, and the future.

As the writer most sensibly concludes, dignity is the word.  We live in a society that is completely divided on the subject of female modesty.  It is the job of individuals to maintain the image they wish to create, and most importantly, preserve their self respect.  One way is to not fall prey to overexposure.

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As with all contemporary developments, we as Jews must address them from a religious standpoint, to see if we can integrate them into our lives.  The Internet has been debated back and forth like a never ending tennis match, and approached on countless levels; some people still maintain that it is not kosher.  Today, social media poses a new dilemma.  While it requires Internet and forming many relationships, albeit impersonal ones, it is the new marketing tool.  Businesses fear they are at a disadvantage without use of it, primarily Facebook, LinkedIn, and Twitter.  In an article in Mishpacha Magazine (note pdf intro), Libi Astaire explores the controversies of social media, and the Halachic issues they pose, based on a recent conference sponsored by Kishor Professional Network.

The Risks:

• Social media websites are public.  Privacy settings change numerous times without us realizing.  Exposing our personal lives violates the laws of Tznius/modesty.
• The fast pace of the Internet can be quite brain-numbing.  Instant access to information prevents us from developing skills such as analyzing information.
• Social media focuses on developing relationships with strangers in the form of fans and followers, hence weakening our interpersonal skills and relationships with those important to us, including family and friends.
• Social media is addictive and can lead to lots of wasted time.  The web is an endless pit.  Social media specializes in linking vast amounts of sites and people; it is very easy to get caught in that web.

Advantages:

• An inexpensive advertising tool that is both quick and effective.
• Social media sites will access customers who are otherwise be unavailable to you.
• Customers can easily find you via social media search engines.
• Social media constantly updates you with information about your competitors.  In this rapidly evolving world, it is important for businesses not to fall behind and lose the grip in their field.

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Ways to ensure you are Halachically safe in social media:

• Halachic advisories recommend consulting a Rav before venturing into Social Media and taking any actions.  Create a strategy and discuss it with your Rav; set clear boundaries from the start.
• Maintain a strictly business approach to prevent falling prey to personal privacy issues.  Never mix business with personal.
• Set time limits, even time blocks with an alarm, to devote to the social media aspect of the business.  This will help you avoid getting caught up in online chatting and what not, which may result in unintended neglect of your family and home.
• Be sure you regularly reevaluate the benefits of your strategy.  It may just not be worth it, not all businesses require a social media platform.

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The Jewish holidays are so strategically planned.  After assuming the responsibility of consuming the Purim nosh that now lingers in small amounts, I truly look forward to Pesach.  For me, Pesach is both a physical and spiritual cleansing.

Today, there is so much variety amongst Kosher LePesach foods that one rarely feels a difference, aside for the Matzah.  I grew up in a home that uses very little processed food on Pesach.  While the work was greater, and the variety less, the benefits outweighed it all.  Come the end of Pesach, I would very often hesitate before digging back into Chometz.

Health experts have long maintained that processed foods contain excess calories, sugar, fat, preservatives, and additives.  Not only can this be detrimental to our health, it promotes a sluggish lifestyle.  Many people easily fall prey to unhealthy routine because eating healthily requires more work.  In How to Eat a Diet of Non-Processed Foods, Lori Rice sets guidelines and tips on how to ease that transition into a more wholesome diet.

For those already in touch with their body, and have experienced both diets, it is easy to see that there is no coincidence in Chometz being linked with Ga’avah, haughtiness.  When we eat a more wholesome diet, not only do we feel more energized, refreshed, light weighted, and clean, but are more aware of our natural surroundings.  We can accept and appreciate the world as G-d created it.

Luckily, we are forced to see the benefits of the unprocessed diet at least 8 days a year.

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With Pesach just two weeks away, you are either fretting over the mounds of cooking and cleaning, or preparing to pack up for the eight days.  Those lucky enough to move into family, or a Pesach resort, need only to worry about their suitcase, and you can never be too organized with that.

To begin with, choose the luggage pieces.  I prefer one garment bag and one large regular suitcase for my husband, baby, and I.  This way I can ensure the fancier clothing will be better protected and less creased.  Another advantage of a garment bag is that you can bring your hangers without worrying about them poking your delicate clothing.  The lighter the luggage bag, the more weight allowance you can get on flight, and the less likely you are to pay overweight.

Next I consult my packing list, I lay all the contents out to be packed, and arrange it neatly in the suitcases.

Packing list:

• Hat for husband – He usually keeps that in a hat box, which may not fit in the suitcase, and can be carried on board
• Sheitel – I’ve been told by many sheitel ladies it is safe to simply place the sheitel in a shoe box, no need for the extra bulk of a sheitel box
• Tichels/Snoods/Barets
• Undergarments
• Hosiery
• Socks
• Robe
• Nightware
• Skirts – preferably ones you can wear with a few tops to avoid excess luggage
• Tops
• Sweaters
• Dresses
• Coat – perhaps a rain coat and a heavier one because you can never truly predict the weather, unless you are travelling to a warmer climate
• Scarves/Gloves
• Glasses
• Jewelry
• Kosher lePesach make-up
• Kosher lePesach toiletries – including new toothbrushes and toothpaste
• Shoes – fancy and comfortable because you never know what you may end up doing Chol Hamoed
• Slippers
• Shower shoes

For baby:

• Bibs
• Diapers
• Wipes
• Baby soap
• Toys
• Blankets
• Onesies
• Outfits – quiet a few, not all fancy, they always get dirty
• Pyjamas
• Burpies – little towels we use to wipe up messes such as spit up
• Pacifiers – a few because they always get lost, a pacifier chain is also great
• Bottles
• Baby food
• Hat
• Coat/Snowsuit

• Stroller

Carry on:

• Diaper bag
• Food for everyone
• Baby change of clothing
• Purse
• (Hat box)
• Tallis/Tefillin
• Sidur/Haggadah
• Valuables

Start your list now.  Keep it handy.  You will keep adding to it everyday.  Remember to refer back to it when you pack to ensure you have not forgotten anything.  Good luck and have a Kosher and Freilachen Pesach!

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Today sewing is more a hobby than necessity.   People choose to work a garment to add their personal touch and originality.  Majority of times the outcome is great, and it is highly unlikely to find an exact replica.  Rather than replacing the old with the new, the old is revamped.  It is the ultimate money saving hobby because it includes recycling and obliterates tailoring fees.

Working with what you already have:

Here is a sweater I found in my closet from when I was literally 12 years old (I am 24 now).  It is navy, my favorite color, but it is plain and shapeless.

I hated it then and love it now…

I simply added a belt to give it shape, replaced the missing buttons with different fun ones, and added lace to the pockets.  All of which I found in my house.  I now have a unique sweater that I am actually proud of and look forward to wearing! I especially love the fact that I now have an extra sweater in my wardrobe.  I am constantly struggling to find something to wear, now I will simply pull out my old clothing and apply some changes so I can wear them.

There are many self help books that can guide you in basic sewing and making your clothing more innovative.  Twinkle Sews has some great ideas for the more advanced sewers.  Check out some vintage clothing sites to get ideas on how to revamp old clothing, or ideally, simply tap into your physical and mental resources to produce your own masterpieces.

In defiance of the exploitation of the female body, more women are turning to modest dress.  Worshiping skin exposure has led many to feel violated against.  So, to redirect focus to the inner beauty of an individual, women are using conservative dress to allow the beauty of their mind and soul to shine forth.  At the same time, removing attention from physical beauty protects what should be private, and most importantly, treasured. (Photo Credit)

The prospect of modest dress has been endorsed by feminists too.  True feminists are those chaste young women who are defending their individuality and defying group-think and social convention.  The end of the last century  has shown a change of face in fashion.  Material seems to be scarce, and styles extremely suggestive.  What message are victims of such dress codes trying to give?

“All the time the aristocratic Suffragette is vehemently asserting that she will no longer be a toy, a doll, a dancing-girl, a merely ornamental thing, a pleasure, she is dressing more and more as if that were exactly what she was.”

-G.K. Chesterton, “Fashionable Suffragettes and the Truly Feminine,” The Illustrated London News, 1912

It is no wonder more woman are being subject to various forms of harassment.  Therefore, many opt for covering up.

Guidelines for modest dress existed well before the advent of feminism, for the same reasons and more.  Judaism appreciates the beauty of a woman, and dictates laws of modesty to protect and nurture her being.  A Jewish woman is considered a Bat Melech, a daughter of the king, G-d, and considered precious to Him.  The same way we protect our precious jewelry (in jewelry boxes), G-d has given us guidelines to protect ourselves.  Dressing in accordance underlines our self respect and dignity, and incidentally, modestly plays a role in women being taken seriously as well.

Dressing modestly does not mean letting go.  Rather, it is important to maintain a level of self-respect and choose clothing that is both aesthetically pleasing yet tastefully modest.

You want to get into that Purim spirit, but you do not want to infringe on your modesty.  You think you are too old to dress up, yet you still feel that nagging desire to be part of the fun.   Here are some suggestions for woman and girls who want to add that subtle Purim festive touch to their outfit without being overly flamboyant:

Masks

Find the mask you like to slip on whenever you are in the mood!  Masks can really top off your costume.

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Headpieces

There are so many types of hats, fascinators, and headbands that just add that little bit of animation.  There are feathers, bows, and even nets that go over the face, to reincarnate that glamorous look.  Be sure to choose one you are comfortable with, and that is elaborate enough for you.

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Add Some Sparkle

…to your face with glittered or colored fake eyelashes.  At first, they may seem a little extreme off the shelf, but once you put them on, they are actually not as flashy:  they look quite glamorous!

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Funky Costume Jewelery

Long beaded necklaces, bangles, and earrings, really do the job in boosting your outfit.

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Circle Your Skirt

There’s no need to take your hemline up, when on Purim you can take it down and even more fully around with a half-circle or full-circle skirt.  This has an amazingly festive look for ladies of any age because it is simply timeless – plus it is fun to wear!  This type of garment is certainly delightful and modest, and also lends a distinct refinement to a Purim outfit.  While a skimpy “costume” could turn a woman into a mere object of decoration, you will feel like you are floating with an air of feminine graciousness when you don a circle skirt.

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Colorful Flat Shoes

While you have your hemline full and long, pair it up with flat shoes.  Colorful shoes will really complete the Purim look.

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